I'll Die Another Day
by Reality Rejection Service
Summary: TFA AU. Han Solo makes a request that might save his life. Two-shot. SPOILER ALERT.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I still do not own _Star Wars_. I am of the opinion that Han Solo didn't deserve to die, but his death was a fitting one. However, I can't help but "what-if" Han Solo living.**

 **I'm still working on _Avenging Angel_. I'll get to _Crossing the Rubicon_ as soon as I can.**

* * *

 **Star Wars: I'll Die Another Day, Chapter 1- Special Surprise**

New Jedi Academy

Unknown world, 7 years after the Battle of Endor

 _The day was bright and clear. Luke Skywalker was happily teaching new Jedi recruits the ways of the Force and the lightsaber. His first batch of trainees had just been successfully Knighted._

 _Han Solo was impressed. Once upon a time, he had called it mumbo-jumbo. Now, as he watched Luke and his former students train the next generation, Han felt like an outlier, a man among gods._

 _So, Han wanted his own lightsaber. Luke had explained the basics of it to him, and Han himself had borrowed Luke's own saber a couple times. However, with the so-called First Order starting to appear, Han wanted some… extra protection._

 _In Han's mind, a lightsaber would do the trick. But would Luke allow it? Han couldn't feel the Force._

 _But, then Luke (who was just starting to grow a beard) spotted him, and, pausing to give instructions to his new teachers, went to greet his brother-in-law._

" _Han! How are you?" Luke asked._

" _Just fine, Kid. Nice batch of recruits you got there," Han replied._

" _Thank you. They're coming along nicely."_

" _That they are. Listen, Luke, I want to ask you something, and I hope you don't take it the wrong way…"_

" _What is it?" Luke asked._

" _Is there anything... in the Jedi teachings… about not Jedi having lightsabers?"_

 _Luke was puzzled. "You mean, like-" Luke's voice lowered. "-the Sith?"_

" _No, no. I mean just regular folk. People who can't… do what it is you do."_

" _Ah. Well, in the teachings, no. Jedi are taught, however, to take great care with a lightsaber. It is a valuable tool, not a weapon, but they can cause great harm in the wrong hands._

" _However, there are stories of 'normal' people having lightsabers. Ben still talks to me sometimes."_

" _Oh?" Han asked. "And how do those go? The old man did lie, or whatever it was he called it, to you."_

" _The truth 'from a certain point of view?' Yeah. Anyhow, during the Clone Wars, there was a figure called General Grievous. Grievous was a cyborg who would take the lightsabers of Jedi he killed?"_

" _How many did he kill?"_

" _At least four. Obi-Wan killed him with a few well-placed blaster shots."_

 _Han laughed at that. Maybe he didn't need a lightsaber after all…_

 _Then again, one of the things he had learned as a smuggler was to be prepared for anything._

" _Luke… would it be possible for someone like me to learn how to build and use one?"_

 _The smile on Luke's face died, replaced by a thoughtful frown. "I don't know for sure; the building of a lightsaber requires, in some parts, one to be trained in the use of the Force. So does maintaining it. As for using one, though, not so much."_

 _Luke looked over to where two of his fellow masters stood. "If you really want a lightsaber, Han, I would recommend talking to Master Ezra Bridger. He built a rather interesting weapon, a saber that was also a blaster."_

" _Thanks, Luke. I appreciate it. I wasn't sure if I was committing some sin."_

" _You're not. I must say again, though, that the process of training with a lightsaber, building one, and using one is a long, grueling process. You will not be the same man coming out of it that you were when you started."_

" _I understand. It's just that, with the First Order, I just have a bad feeling about it."_

" _And a lightsaber would put your mind at ease?"_

" _It would give anyone who attacked me a special surprise, at least." Han said, smirking at the last part._

 _Luke chuckled. "Like I said, talk to Master Bridger. And may the Force be with you."_

* * *

Hyperspace, aboard the _Millennium Falcon_

Approaching Starkiller Base, present day

Han was taking stock of his weapons with Finn and Chewie. There were an assortment of blaster pistols, rifles, the grenades he'd loaded prior to leaving, and another bowcaster (Han had forgotten about that, and eagerly slung it over his shoulder).

Finn had strapped on a couple pistols, and so had Chewie. Han himself was looking at the stockpile, before snapping his fingers and disappearing.

Han jogged to the Captain's Quarters, and, pulling out a box from under his cot, opened it.

Inside was a wooden case with all his war medals. Yavin. Endor, and too many more places came to mind as the old smuggler ran his fingers over each one, before setting the case gently aside.

There was a print photo of the family- himself, Leia, Luke, his wife, their child- Ben.

 _What happened to you, my son?_

And underneath that, a long metal case. Han opened it, and there it was.

His own lightsaber. Han carefully pulled it out of the box, and stood, the cylinder fitting perfectly in his hand. Han's thumb found the button, and-

 _Snap-hiss_. A bright, blue blade pierced the air. Han took a few moments to run through the forms he had been taught.

The old man had been right. A lightsaber was not as "clunky or as random as a blaster." Han was not going to just let himself get stabbed by his own son, however.

 _But could I…_ _ **kill**_ _my own son?_

Han Solo, for once, had no idea.


	2. Chapter 2- The Thing I Don't Want To Do

**A/N: I do not own _Star Wars_. Get ready for some feels!**

* * *

 **Star Wars: I'll Die Another Day, Chapter 2- The Thing I Don't Want To Do, I Do**

Starkiller Base

Present Day

Han Solo was having a severe case of déjà vu. He remembered the Death Star, and how he had snuck around it for a while, helping Luke rescue a Princess.

Now, Han was helping an ex-Stormtrooper sneak back on to Starkiller Base- a bigger Death Star, in his opinion- to rescue the girl he was smitten with.

 _History repeats itself_.

There was one difference, though; Leia had asked Han before leaving that if he saw Ben, to bring him home.

 _Oh, Leia, I don't know if I can do it_.

Han had seen, firsthand, what Ben Solo and his new _friends_ had done to Luke's Academy. In the years after that, Han had heard reports of atrocities the First Order would commit, and would wonder if his son had been there.

He knew Leia had similar thoughts, and wished that Ben had indeed _not_ been there.

And so they snuck through the base, Han marveling about how the First Order could train their soldiers to be decent shots- but not about such things as peripheral vision. It was rather easy to sneak in and disable the planetary shields before disposing of Finn's former commanding officer via garbage chute.

 _At least I'm not going down there this time_ , Han mused.

Moments later, they found Rey. Han and Chewie worked to blow up the building they were in while Finn blasted everything resembling a Stormtrooper in his drive to get to Rey.

Han had placed all of his charges, and was just about to climb up a ladder, when he saw _him_.

Ben Solo. Kylo Ren.

 _Son._

Ben was stomping across a catwalk, unaware that dear old Dad was right there. Han moved to the edge of the catwalk, hand straying to his trusted blaster and lightsaber.

 _It would be so easy to walk away…_

 _But he's my son_. _Leia's son._ _ **Our**_ _son._

"BEN!"

* * *

Ben Solo stopped, indignation flashing across his face.

 _Of all the bantha loving-_

Ben turned to face his father.

"Han Solo. I've been waiting for this day for a long time."

Han Solo strode towards his long lost son.

"Take off that mask. Ya don't need it."

"What do you think you'll see if I do?"

"The face of my _son_."

To Han's relief, Ben took off that ridiculous helmet.

"Your son… is gone. He was weak and foolish, like his father. So I destroyed him."

"That's what Snoke wants you to believe. But it's not true. My son is _alive_."

"No. The Supreme Leader is wise."

"Snoke is using you for your power. He gets what he wants, he'll crush you. You know it's true."

Ben was quiet for a few moments. "It's too late."

"No, it's not. Leave here with me, come home. We miss you."

"I'm being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain. I know what I have to do, but I don't know if I have the strength to do it."

"Will you help me?"

"Yes. Anything."

Ben dropped the helmet, and unclipped his lightsaber, holding it sideways between them. Han reached out to grab it, just as the light from the nearby star faded away, consumed by the immense fuel requirements for Starkiller Base.

And that was when the hairs on the back of Han's neck stood ramrod straight up.

 _No…_

Han jumped back, just as Ben Solo- now Kylo Ren once more- ignited his saber. Han followed suit a moment later, and the sabers met with a loud crash.

Han backpedaled, each saber strike being safely blocked by those of his son. Even though the blade hadn't even touched his heart yet, it sure felt like it.

Up above, Rey and Finn started firing at all the Stormtroopers they could see while Chewie found the ones they couldn't, as father and son hacked it out.

Kylo Ren was out of practice, sure, but so was Han- and the smuggler was far older. Han would have preferred pushing forward with everything he had, but now it took everything he had to fend off his son.

 _Ben, STOP! Don't make me do this!_ Han pleaded mentally.

 _No._ The voice was Kylo's, and entirely unwelcome. Han had hated it whenever Ezra, Luke, or Leia got in his head; the same now went for Kylo.

 _Get out_.

The two men continued in their deadly dance, until another _snap-hiss_ was heard.

Finn had joined the fight. Between them, Kylo Ren was hard pressed to keep up, with Finn providing the energy that Han lacked.

Han began to tire, but, like the stubborn nerf-herder that he was, the old man pressed on.

Until his grip faltered for a moment. Kylo was too skilled not to seize the opportunity, and knocked Han's saber from his hand, before shoving him away with the Force. Kylo Ren advanced towards the man he had once called "Father."

"You thought I could be saved. Like I said- weak _and_ foolish."

Kylo raised his saber. "Goodbye, _Father_."

Han was too dazed to move.

But before the blow could land, Finn blocked it, and the two continued the dance.

Then, Finn went down, a nasty looking gash running dangerously close to his spine.

That was when _Rey_ appeared, Han's saber held aloft.

And _they_ went at each other. Han would later say that he had never seen anything like it. Rey was matching the former Jedi blow for blow.

 _Just like her father,_ Han mused. _Gifted_.

Han watched as the scavenger from Jakku held her ground, and at one point even managed to slash the tip of her weapon across Kylo's face.

 _Ouch. That'll scar._

The change that came over Kylo as he stumbled away in shock was swift. Before, he had been cold, calculating, methodical in his movements, putting no more energy than necessary into his strikes.

After that strike, Han could see the glint in his son's eyes. It was something primal, animalistic.

So was the sound that came forth from his lips.

And Kylo Ren's attacks became _savage_ , every ounce of power he had behind every blow.

Not even a prodigy like Rey could keep up. In much the same manner that Han had been disarmed, so was Rey.

Kylo Ren advanced menacingly towards the young scavenger, calling the saber Finn had been using, then the one Rey had borrowed. A slight gesture with the Force, and Rey was now upright, on her knees. Kylo Ren circled her before raising one of the lightsabers, fully intent on taking her head off while giving Han a full view of the show.

 _No…_

Han was fully awake now. There was no time. Han had tried, but the boy was too far gone.

 _Leia… I'm sorry… I tried._

"BEN!"

* * *

Kylo Ren made one fatal mistake in that moment- his focus was on the wrong thing. After that swipe at his face, Kylo had been so determined to _make the scavenger pay_ that he had forgotten about Solo completely.

Kylo never saw Han's right arm move. He never heard the slight sound of a blaster being pulled from its holster.

By the time Han had shouted his son's name, it had been too late.

BLAM BLAM BLAM!

* * *

Shock was evident on the faces of all who witnessed it. None more so than Ben Solo. He could smell the charred flesh, could feel his life force ebbing away.

There was only one thing he could say in that moment.

"Thank you…"

* * *

It was a long, somber ride back to the Resistance base. Finn was laid up in the medbay, Rey was in the navigator's chair, just detached from everything, Chewie was flying the _Falcon_ , and Han-

-Han kept watch over his son. There was no place Han felt he should be.

 _Oh, my son. What have I done?_

* * *

Leia was there when the _Falcon_ landed. Finn was immediately rushed to the infirmary, but Leia paid them no attention. She had felt someone die.

Chewie and Han came down that ramp next, carrying someone on a stretcher. Leia knew all too well now who it was.

 _NO!_

Leia collapsed, but Han caught her before she hit the ground.

"I'm so, so _sorry_ , Leia. I… t-tried. I really did. But he was just too far _gone_."

Leia didn't stop crying for a long, long time.

Sure, the Resistance won, but for Han and Leia, the war had taken too much from them.

Finn recovered, and, after asking Han first, took the last name of Solo. Together with Rey and Poe Dameron, the pilot who had destroyed Starkiller Base, the trio would go on to change the galaxy.

When Rey finally faced Snoke, having completed her training under Luke Skywalker, she fought in Ben's name, using the unique saber the old monster's apprentice had created to bring the monster down.


End file.
